How to get a bigger penis.
It's a question everyone with a penis has wondered at some point. Don't say you haven't. We saw your Google search history. And yeah, we have screenshots for proof.
If you are to google how to get a bigger penis, you'll find a lot of different, exotic and exciting methods recommended.
Some people say that you can maximise your member by doing penis enlargement exercises. We're not really sure what a penis exercise is. Do you strap a barbell onto it? Make it do pushups? Crunches? All of these options seem to be impractical and painful.
There are herbs that you can supposedly take to make your johnson gigantic but when you read the side effects it gets a little scary. Your wiener will be wilder but you'll be blind in one eye and have green spots so no one will shag you anyway to see it.
A number of devices can be purchased by those who want to have plumper penises. There are pumps you squeeze, braces that you twist and something that had an electric motor that plugged into a wall that scared us so much we X-ed out of the page before we read what it was. These devices all seem about as pleasant as that penis exercise idea. Ouch. No thanks.
You can also pay a ridiculous amount of money for a book on how to make your penis bigger and then read it only to find out that the true size of your penis comes from within or some shit like that. We only skimmed it. Our desire to know how to get a bigger penis is dwarfed only by our desire to do as little as possible to get the results.
Because of our laziness factor, the only method of penis enlargement that we're ready to wholeheartedly endorse is the Trouser Enlarger. Simpler than penis enlargement exercises and certain to not make you go blind, this revolutionary device finally solves the riddle of how to get a bigger penis.
So what is this alternative to penis exercise, dangerous herbs and that motorized torture device? The Trouser Enlarger is a pump that you stuff into your trouser front. Use the ball valve to inflate the faux dick and voila. You've got a breathtaking bulge that will have the ladies wanting to get close to you. You're on your own once your pants come off though. Maybe stash a cucumber under the covers or something!
The Trouser Enlarger is a hilarious gag gift to give to a gent that you want to mortify forever. It's also a funny choice of bachelorette party ideas. Give one to the bride-to-be for her hubby-in-the-making so he can impress her with his bulge on the big day. You can also purchase a spare one for yourself...we won't tell anyone about it (or about your search history).
Flat Ship Delivery £3.95 per order:
We like to keep things simple for our customers and that's why we offer a set £3.95 flat shipping rate per order. Standard delivery takes 5-7 working days. Please see delivery details page for more information.