Women are a mystery. There is absolutely no doubt about that. A man can spend his whole life studying them and be no closer to understanding the riddle that is woman when he dies than he was when he was a pimply faced teen.
There are a lot of things about women that are completely baffling. Why do they go to the bathroom in pairs? Why do they always want to talk about feelings? Why do they tell you about their problems and then get annoyed when you try to solve them, saying "I JUST WANT YOU TO LISTEN!" Why do they get so irate about leaving the toilet seat up? Can't they just put it down?!?
But for all of the mysteries of womanhood, there is one that truly leaves men curious and perhaps a little frightened--what exactly do they carry inside of their handbags?
We can't be completely certain, but we have some theories. We believe that the average woman's handbag must contain:
How else would they always manage to have whatever you need to cure what ails you? Have a headache? A woman will have an aspirin. Got a stomachache? Oh, here's a digestive biscuit! Ask a woman if she has Viagra, and she probably will!
We don't know what all of those tubes, bottles, plastic compact thingies, brushes, sponges and other devices do, but we know that there are a lot of them in women's purses. Yet, we never ever see them put them on.
Were they used for nose blowing? For wiping away woman tears? Are they fresh? Clean? It's all part of the fun!
But always with no money in it. Why carry cash? The women know the gents are going to pay!
These are supposedly used for unexpected wardrobe malfunctions. We think they are secretly for stabbing men when they drift off during romantic films at the cinema.
Women always seem to want chocolate. They surely keep it around in their handbags.
We don't know what they are or what they do, and we don't ever want to know. Thanks.
This is the place where women write down all of the little things that bug them about you so that when they get angry, they can sneakily glance inside and then bring up every tiny little thing that you ever did wrong all at once without even taking a breath.
This gadget is used to tape record all of your arguments, so that they can throw back whatever you said in your face when you least expect it!
While we can't say for certain that this list is complete, universal or correct at all, these are best guesses as to just what's in a girl's purse. But like all things when it comes to women, we'll never know what's really going on in there.
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